Our Little Secret
by Snowviolet
Summary: What would Puck do to keep Rachel from walking away that day on the bleachers? Just about anything. Like promise her that he'd help her win Finn's heart! Little did they know that secret pact would change their lives forever.
1. Chapter 1

_"We weren't friends before."_

Puck quickly pulled away from Rachel's touch, looking anywhere but her face. If he met her eyes, she would see through his facade. And the last thing he was going to do was act like a pussy in front of the of the football team over a chick. He had a badass reputation to think of. It had nothing to do with how he felt different when he was around her. Or how he had smiled more in the last week with her, than he had in the last year of cougars and trampy Cheerios. She was just a stupid gleek!

As he leaned forward, Finn's eyes met his from the field below. The golden boy didn't look too happy that he and Rachel were having such an intimate conversation. Finn stretched and paced increasingly closer to the bleachers with a scowl on his face. Subtlety wasn't his boy's strong point, but for some reason the chicks ate it up. The moment Rachel walked away, Finn would unwittingly charm her into thinking she was his world and she'd never look back.

Fuck that.

Puck reached out and grabbed Rachel's hand as she turned to leave, tugging her back towards him. She squeaked in surprise and stumbled against the aluminum step. His arm shot out and caught her by the waist before she could fall and he easily settled her small frame into his lap. Puck held back laughter at the fury building in her eyes as she drew in a breath to let him have it. With a voice like hers, his ears would be bleeding if she had the chance to get started. When Rachel got pissed her voice went up octaves, and she looked like she was ready to go sonar.

In a quick motion Puck cradled her head his hands and brushed his lips against hers in gentle kisses that took Rachel by surprise. The tightly wound diva deflated in increments with each whisper soft touch of his lips until she had lost her will to argue. In between kisses, he coaxed her in a rumble of words that she felt against her skin.

"We're _**not**_ breaking up, Berry." He interjected his kisses by rubbing his stubble against her throat in a tingling rasp.

"Yes, we _**are**_, Noah." Rachel replied in a dazed, but firm voice. "I explained that this isn't going to go anywhere."

"Because you want to be with Finn, right?" Puck asked, trying to sound casual. He fought the urge to pull her closer.

Rachel looked away, her cheeks pink. "I should never have agreed to date you in the first place. I'm so sorry, Noah. It was wrong of me to use you like that."

Puck just gave her a wicked smile, and whispered against her ear. "Lover boy is watching us. Every time I touch you, every time you smile at me, he starts to lose it."

A thrill went over Rachel as he whispered to her, although she wasn't sure if it was because of his words, or because of his warm breath tickling at the nape of her neck. It was wrong to want to torture Finn...wasn't it?

"Finn's never been the sharpest tack in the box, but he knows that he wants you, Rachel. He's just not willing to _**do**_ anything about it." Puck punctuated his point by scraping his teeth against her earlobe. "He thinks he doesn't have a choice in the matter. That he has to stand by Quinn, and what he wants is out of reach."

Rachel quieted in his arms as the words sank in. Puck could almost hear the gears moving in her little head. "And you think he needs a little push to do something about it?" She asked uncertainly, daring a peek over her shoulder at the gangly teen eyeing them from the field.

"He thinks I'm just chasing tail, and that I'll toss you aside when I get tired of you." Puck played with her hair, running the strands through his fingers.

"Aren't you?" Rachel said quietly. "It's your usual MO."

Puck's mind raced to form an answer. What the hell _**was**_ he doing with her? He wasn't ready to face that sort of question, so he said the first thing he could think of.

"You're in a position to give me something I want."

Rachel nodded slowly in understanding. "Quinn."

Puck blinked in confusion, but covered his expression quickly. "Give the girl a gold star." He drawled lazily.

"If Finn acts upon his feelings for me, you hope that Quinn will reciprocate your feelings for her once they have broken up."

Puck made a noncommittal grunt, and ran his hand over his scalp. This wasn't coming out the way he had intended it to. Although he wasn't sure what he had intended. He just knew that when he had seen Finn waiting for him to fuck up, something had snapped.

"If Finn believes that I'm serious about you, he won't be able to stop himself." Puck said with a sinking feeling in his stomach. "We just have to convince him that this is real. That we really are falling in l-l-l...."

Rachel's laughter tinkled in his ear. "Can't say the L word, Noah? What happened to your badassness?"

"Whatever!" He sneered and looked away. "Do you want to do this, or not?"

Rachel looked at him solemnly, searching his face until she seemed satisfied. "It's a deal. We date until Finn admits his feelings for me."


	2. Chapter 2

_**Author's Note: What a surprising response! I'm glad to see there are so many other Puck/Rachel shippers out there. I felt inspired by all the comments to get another chapter out quickly. That, and these two just throw words down on a page without very much effort. I did want to note that I am using a lot of cursing in this story because I think it fits Puck's personality. He's totally the kind of guy who would talk dirty to you in bed. ;)**_ **_But I digress...hope you enjoy this installment!_**

Rachel Berry walked through the school doors the next morning in a daze, not quite sure what to expect. She'd had a hard time getting to sleep last night after her...discussion with Noah? Well it was more like a car crash where you don't have enough time to react and just hold on and pray to avoid serious injury. "Discussion" wasn't really doing it justice. There had been very little actual talking, and she flushed every time she remembered the way his stubble had felt against her skin.

There was no denying that the scamp had an effect on her. She was a modern woman, and she had no problem admitting that she found him sexually attractive. That devilish smirk of his made his nickname all the more apt. He was sin and sensuality all wrapped up in a sly intelligence. She had run his plan over and over in her mind, and it was sound. She had felt Finn's eyes on her as Puck had walked her off the field last night to her car, and she had gotten a text from Kurt later that Finn had accidentally knocked out one of the other players in a tackle after they left.

Noah's deception would surely have results. But what would he do next? He'd sent her off in her car last night, and told her to trust him with a small smile. That smile had made her more nervous than a jock rushing towards her with a Slushie.

The day was strangely uneventful until Spanish. Just after Mr. Shuester had started his usual exercises, the door swung open. Puck stepped inside and handed a sheet to Mr. Shuester, who looked at it questioningly. "You're changing classes a little late in the semester, Puck."

"Spanish will help me with my home business, Mr. Shue." He said insincerely, winking in Rachel's direction. "I'm just thinking of my future."

"Ok...have a seat and we'll talk about catching up to speed after class." Mr. Shuester said in a resigned voice. "Just don't expect an easy A with no effort."

"I wouldn't dream of it, Mr. S." Puck scoffed as he took a seat just behind Rachel and Finn. Both Finn and Quinn were staring at him like he had two heads, and Rachel was staring straight ahead and biting her lip not to laugh.

"Pssst!" Puck hissed loud enough where the entire class couldn't help but listen. "Hey, Q. Switch seats with me."

Mr. Shuester sighed and turned away from the board again. "Is there a problem, Puck?"

"No problem!" Puck said unapologetically. " It's just that Rachel promised to share her notes with me so I could catch up quicker."

"Quinn, would you mind moving so that we can get back to the lecture?" Mr. Shuester was frustrated with the disruptions at this point.

"Whatever!" Quinn huffed, sliding out of her desk so that Puck could have a seat.

Finn's jaw tightened as Puck actually took out a notebook and started copying Rachel's notes. But not before casually brushing her hair to the side so that he had a better view of her notes and her chest. Rachel smiled as he made funny little comments to her under his breath throughout the rest of class that no one else could hear.

"Didn't think I actually knew how to study, did you?" He asked teasingly.

Rachel shook her head slowly from side to side, with a muffled giggle.

"I told you to trust me. No one tried to Slush you today, did they?"

Again she shook her head, a little surprised at his concern.

"You probably heard that Coach dropped the whole war of the extracurriculars."

Rachel nodded, not sure where he going with this line of thought.

" I had a little "talk" with my boys after practice." He said with no small amount of male satisfaction. "I can't promise that they'll stay away from everyone in Glee, but you don't have to worry about getting a Slushie facial anymore."

Rachel spun around in true surprise at that. "Noah! You could have been hurt! That was extremely reckless and unnecessary....and, and what were you thinking?!"

Mr. Shuester turned from the board again with a frown. "Rachel, if you can't pretend to pay attention, at least keep it down!"

The class snickered, but Puck cursed inwardly. Shit. How was he going to explain himself this time? He'd enjoyed beating the crap out of the little shits. He told them if he saw so much as a drop of Slushie on her shoe, he'd tell the Cheerios about their "little" problem in the showers. No dude was going to risk having his junk gossiped about in a negative light.

He decided to be nonchalant."No way was I letting that bullshit slide. They needed to be reminded of their place." As an afterthought he threw in, "Plus, Finn didn't know what to think when I did it."

Rachel frowned, but was distracted at a sharp sound that echoed in the classroom.

"Puck!" Mr. Shuester yelled.

"It's not me, I swear Mr. S!" Puck threw his hands up innocently.

A broken pencil rolled off of Finn's desk at that moment, and he leaned over in embarrassment to scoop up the pieces. He had snapped it while watching Rachel and Puck whisper to each other.

Puck pretended to be oblivious to the glare Finn was sending his way. Leaning close enough so that his lips almost touched her ear, he whispered. "It's killing him that he has no idea what I'm saying to make you smile. Say cheese, baby."

Rachel forgot where they were for a moment, his low voice mesmerizing her. Blinking, she smiled slowly as he had requested, and then the bell rang.

Before she knew it, Puck had swept in and picked up her books. She grinned up at him, and they walked out of class together, leaving the entire room staring at the supernatural experience of Puck _**doting**_ on a girl.


	3. Chapter 3

_**Author's Note:**_

_**Ok folks, don't get used to such frequent updates... but I'm having such a blast writing this story that I figure I may as well get it down on paper while its buzzing around in my head.**_

_**While the nature of Glee begs for a lot of songfic action, I don't particularly think an entire song worth of verses or jazz hands translates that well in writing. I may condense verses and "choreography" so that they aren't as long.**_

_**Honestly? We're not reading Puck/Rachel fics to see them tap dance while singing verses. Unless you mean tap dancing in the biblical sense, which wouldn't really apply since in Puck's words they are "a couple of good looking Jews".**_

Rachel entered Glee rehearsal a little late that afternoon. She had been so flustered after Spanish she had to splash cold water on her face to calm down. She wasn't used to being the center of attention outside of Glee Club. It was one thing to have an audience listening to her sing, but quite another to have half the school gawking at her and Puck as they walked down the hallway together. The scene in Spanish class had already circulated around the school, and it seemed that the entire student body had to confirm the story personally.

Rachel flashed a small smile and hurried to the open spot next to Kurt and Tina. She didn't think she could handle another one-on-one with Puck just yet. Glee was the one place where she could find solace in her crazy life.

As Mr. Shuester handed out a new piece, Kurt hissed in a low tone at her. "You _**have**_ to spill on what has gotten into that boy!"

"Enquiring m-m-minds want to know, Rach." Tina nodded from her other side.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Rachel said primly, taking the sheet music that Mr. Shuester handed to her.

Her denial wasn't very effective as Puck chose that moment to smirk at her from across the stage. He and the other football players were kidding around, except for Finn. Quinn had latched onto him upon entering the room, and she was alternately shooting evil looks at Rachel and smiling too brightly at Finn.

Mr. Shuester raised his voice to get their attention. "Ok, you guys. It's time to get serious about Sectionals. We need to flesh out our repertoire, so I wanted to try a few new songs."

"Now Finn, wait for Rachel to start and then-"

Puck cut him off. "Mr. S, I've got this one." He confidently tugged the lead vocal sheet music from Finn's hands before he could react.

All the heads in the room turned towards him in surprise.

"This....is a love song, Puck." Mr. Shuester said politely. "Maybe we can switch things up on the "It's My Life/Confessions" mashup so that you have the lead there? You seem a little more rock n' roll than emo to me."

Puck met his gaze evenly. "I think I deserve a shot at the song. I've got a damn good voice, and there's more to me than just rock n'roll."

The room went silent, and everyone looked expectantly at Mr. Shuester.

"You're right." Mr. Shuester said slowly. "You really impressed me with "Sweet Caroline" last week. Let's run through it once-"

This time he was interrupted by an angry Finn. "Mr. Shuester! You can't be serious!"

"It's only fair to let everyone have the opportunity for lead parts, Finn. You can try out for the song after Puck, if you like."

Finn's mouth opened and closed as he tried to think of something to say to that. Unable to come up with a valid complaint, he pulled away from Quinn and stormed to the corner.

Rachel gulped as Artie started up the intro on his guitar. So much for Glee being her only solace.

She started in a sweet, simple voice.

_She said, "I've got to be honest,  
You're wasting your time if you're fishin' around here."_

Puck turned to her and sang with a quiet urgency that no one was expecting.

_And I said, "You must be mistaken,  
I'm not foolin', this feelin' is real."  
_

With a flip of her hair, Rachel turned away to continue.

_She said, "You've gotta be crazy!  
What do you take me for? Some kinda of easy mark?"  
_

Puck took her shoulders and turned her around slowly to face him.

_"You've got wits,  
You've got looks,  
You've got passion,  
But I swear that you've got me all wrong."_

_All wrong,  
All wrong.  
But you've got me..._

I'll be true, I'll be useful, I'll be cavalier,  
I'll be yours my dear  
And I'll belong to you  
If you just let me through..."

He lifted her chin so that she was looking into his eyes, and they sang together.

_This is easy as lovers go.  
So don't complicate it by hesitating.  
This is wonderful as loving goes.  
This is tailor made,  
What's the sense in waiting?  
_  
Rachel stepped away as though uncertain, but he caught her hand and held it in his. Puck's eyes softened, but his voice was clear as he continued.

_I said, "I've got to be honest,  
I've been waiting for you all of my life."  
For so long I thought I was asylum bound,  
But just seeing you makes me think twice.  
And being with you here makes me sane.  
I fear I'll go crazy if you leave my side._

_"You've got wits,  
You've got looks,  
You've got passion,  
But are you brave enough to leave with me tonight?"_

Tonight  
Tonight  
You've got me...

They sang to each other as the last chorus started.

_This is easy as lovers go. So don't complicate it by hesitating.  
This is wonderful as loving goes.  
This is tailor made, what's the sense in waiting?_

Puck tugged at her arm and she twirled slowly towards him, his arms around her waist as they sang the last note together.

A loud whoop broke out from the others, and they rushed forward in appreciation. Finn didn't say a word about trying out for the song, but Rachel noticed he was clenching and unclenching his hands in tight fists.

Somehow it seemed secondary to the buzz she was experiencing from singing with Puck. He hadn't stumbled once over the tender lyrics, and she felt like they were the only two people in the room. In the world. What was he _**doing**_ to her?

***

_Three...two...one. _Just as Puck expected, Finn arrived at his locker after Glee had ended for the day. He hadn't been oblivious to his friend's reactions in class and during rehearsal. The attention that he was paying to Rachel was too effective. At this rate Finn would be spilling his guts to Rachel by the end of the week.

Finn was a good guy, but Puck wasn't going to back down on this one. Not this time. He had already had Quinn. He wasn't getting Rachel too.

Puck lifted his chin at Finn."S'up, bro."

Finn launched into an angry accusation. "About what happened in Glee, Puck-"

"Yeah, you're welcome man." Puck chuckled.

Finn stared at him dumbly. "Welcome for what, exactly?"

"I saw the way Quinn was looking at Rachel when Mr. Shuester handed out the parts. I think she would have snapped if you sang another duet with her." Puck rolled his eyes. "Hormones, dude."

All the anger was sucked out of Finn at the mention of Quinn and her condition. He was still upset, but Puck had done him a favor in a way.

"...yeah, hormones. Quinn's been kind of high-strung lately. Thanks."

"Anytime, bro. You'd do the same for me."

Finn looked at Puck sharply, still suspicious. "What's going on between you and Rachel?"

"Really?" Puck stared at him in disbelief." Are we on Oprah? Is this a special session with Dr. Phil where we share our feelings?"

Finn bristled at the sarcasm, but couldn't really say anything without sounding stupid. "Let's get to practice. I need to blow off some steam." He said lamely.

****

Later that night, Rachel stretched her arms as she finished the last of her history homework. It was hard to concentrate after the day she'd had. Puck had surprised her. Again.

They were supposed to be working together to break up Finn and Quinn, and he kept doing things that threw her off guard. Like beating up thugs from the football team. And carrying her books. And whispering naughty things in her ear...

Rachel didn't like not being in control. She was a diva! She had every bit as much creativity and a flair for the dramatic as Puck! This called for action. Rachel fumed for about ten seconds, and then pulled out her phone.

_Rachel: Meet me the mall in 15 min. _

Her phone lay silent for about a minute and then chirped in response.

_Puck: Y? Need help picking out knee socks?_

_Rachel: Just be there! We need to talk._


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's Note: Is it just me, or is it extremely satisfying watching Puck and Rachel argue? They just have the type of "never back down" sort of personalities that make fights incredibly amusing. This is the last of the chapters for a few days. Halloween weekend, sick kids, and swine flu, oh my!**

****

Puck thought there was something ominous about the phrase "we need to talk" when used by a woman. Nothing good ever came of it. Rachel texted him, and ten minutes later he's slouched in front of the _Orange Julius_ sipping a strawberry smoothie. Whi-pped.

What was he doing here? Waiting on a woman? Studs just did _**not**_ do that.

Although, he was kind of looking forward to spending some time alone with Rachel outside of school. Sure he was a confident guy, but the constant stares and whispers at school got to him after a while too. Why they had to meet at hell-on-earth for men was beyond him. She might as well have asked him to sit through a _Lifetime _ movie-of-the week marathon.

They could have just met at Rachel's house. She had a tricked out room, and a really soft bed...

Although, she's got no reason to make out with you anywhere that Finn isn't watching, he thought bitterly. It wouldn't fit into their "plan".

His "plan". The load of crap he had come up with to keep her from leaving him.

"Noah!" Rachel was waving at him from next to the _New Asia_ food booth. He got up to meet her halfway but was surprised when she launched herself enthusiastically into his arms. Before he could say "moo goo gai pan", she was sucking on his bottom lip with a coy smile.

"Um, nice to see you too?" He wasn't about to complain if she wanted to make out instead of talk.

"Lean down!" Rachel stage whispered.

"Huh?" Puck said in a daze. The way she was kissing his neck was making him eye the nearest available booth with interest.

"You're too tall, lean down! They're watching!'

Oh. Right.

A group of Cheerios was standing at the Ray-Ban kiosk, whispering in scandalous tones as they watched the two of them . Puck leaned in closer to the petite girl's eye level, and Rachel ran her fingers over his mohawk like she was petting a wild animal in response. She kissed him once more lightly on the lips, and pulled back reluctantly. Kissing him felt amazing, even if it was all a lie.

Taking his hand in hers she tugged him towards the stores and out of the food court with a manic sort of energy. Puck wondered if she had gotten into the pseudoephedrine again.

"Not that I don't appreciate that sort of hello, but what has gotten into you, Berry?"

"I just thought that it was a good opportunity to exhibit a public display of affection, given the propensity of the Junior Varsity squad to gossip." Rachel said in a jumble of words. "You're not the only one who has a stake in this charade, Noah!"

"Whoa-a-a-a there, darlin'." Puck said mildly. "No one said you didn't have a stake in this."

"Don't you whoa me, Noah Puckermann!" She said furiously. "I will not stand by idly as you launch Machiavellian plans, without giving me the slightest indication of your next move."

Noah stopped in his tracks, and Rachel stumbled when the brick wall she was hauling came to a halt. He had never thought of using "whoa" as a dirty word.

"And...you thought the best way to address your concerns was to "mall" me?" He raised an eyebrow in her direction. "Pun intended, by the way."

Rachel looked well on her way to a Defcon One hissy fit, so he started walking again. "I didn't intentionally keep you out of the loop, you know." He rubbed at his scalp anxiously. "I just tend to do things off the cuff."

Rachel slowed her pace at that. "I'm not used to having someone treat me so, so...nice. It's a bit of an adjustment, even if it isn't real."

But it could be, Puck thought but didn't say.

"You deserve to have someone treat you like that." He said instead.

Rachel gave him a sad smile. "That's the whole point, isn't it? Which is why we need to be on the same page."

"Fair enough." Puck conceded. "Now, where are we going?"

"Well, we aren't going shopping for knee socks." Rachel huffed. "I didn't realize they weren't to your taste. I think they're very retro."

Puck noticed she was wearing jeans for once, and was alarmed. "Hey, I love the knee socks! I'm fan numero uno of the knee socks."

"You don't have to pretend for my sake, Noah." She said stiffly.

"No one else works the knee socks like you." His eyes started to lose focus as he pictured her in nothing but knee socks. "They make those little skirts ten times hotter."

The lacivious smile he gave her made her smile back before she could stop herself.

"If we aren't shopping for knee socks, why are we here?"

" I thought this was the perfect place for us to be see and be seen as a couple. I'm sure that a texting tree has already been implemented because of our scene in the food court." She grinned slyly. "And no man in his right mind goes shopping with his girlfriend unless he has it _**bad**_."

"Impressive." He grunted in appreciation. "But I think you're going about this all wrong."

Rachel bristled at his words. "I assure you, our presence has definitely been noted-"

"I mean, you're dragging me through the mall like I'm on a leash." He said as he tugged her closer to his side. "I'm supposed to want to be here, right?"

With that, Puck put his arm around her waist and slowed their pace. "Relax a little, have some of my smoothie. Maybe, dare I say it, _**smile**_ a little?"

Rachel laughed a little nervously and took a sip of his smoothie as he had suggested. Puck was dressed in a tight-fitting sweater and jeans that looked amazing on his body. He radiated heat as he tucked her closer to his side, and he smelled like he had just taken a shower.

Glancing around the mall, she realized that they were certainly attracting notice. But it wasn't just the other kids from their school that were watching them. Every woman with a pulse from the age of 3 to 92 was watching him strut through the mall. But he wasn't paying any attention to them, he was all hers.

Rachel shivered at the thought, shaking her head to clear it.

"Are you ok?" Puck asked.

She nodded, not quite trusting herself to answer.


	5. Chapter 5

When Rachel heard the alarm scream, she calmly hit the snooze button without even looking. She had been awake for the last hour anyways, staring at her ceiling as though the secrets of the universe lay within its popcorn texture. What is the meaning of life? Was there a hair product that really gave both bounce and shine? Was it possible that Noah was even more fascinating now than he had been the day before?

The ceiling stared back at her blankly.

"Traitor." She accused it with a sullen look.

Last night was the first time she had ever been able to relax and just be herself around a guy. She wasn't terribly adept at making friends, even female ones. But men made absolutely no sense to her. Every time she talked to a guy she was so nervous that she ended up babbling about obscure Broadway trivia or singing.

But last night had been different. Puck wasn't intimidated by her strong personality, or her tendency to give her opinion on just about everything. He was just as opinionated, and refused to let her have the final say on everything. It was equal parts infuriating and refreshing, spending time with someone who could keep up with her.

Plus, he played dirty. He had no qualms about persuading or convincing her by any means possible. The man was shameless, and she had no problem understanding why his little black book was so full. They'd walked around the mall last night arguing about everything and anything, from which flavor Julius was the best, to which castaway the Professor had been having an affair with on _Gilligan's Island_.

He'd teased her about her habit of humming to herself, and she'd teased him about his haircut. (Although she secretly thought it was the hottest thing since sliced bread.) They'd hit the candy store and he'd shown her how to play Jelly Belly snipers. Although she had been initially horrified, soon he'd convinced her to peg a few of the more obnoxious tweens in the rotunda below them.

The night had gone by so quickly that they were surprised when the mall security guard shooed them out the door at 10. As he had walked her to her car all she could think about was how she hadn't wanted the evening to end.

Which was wrong, wasn't it? She wanted to make Finn notice her. Make him feel jealous enough to admit how he feels. She wasn't supposed to be having a good time doing it!

Rachel sighed and got dressed for the day. It had been true what she had told Puck the night before. She just wasn't used to anyone being so nice to her. It was natural to enjoy the special attention he paid to her. She just needed to keep her eye on the prize.

* *

Puck grinned as he noticed Rachel humming to herself as she dug through her locker. He quietly approached her and leaned over to whisper in her ear, "The Professor was totally deep-dicking Mary Ann."

Rachel shrieked and the contents of her locker seemed to implode as she jumped about a foot into the air, the back of her head smacking against Puck's jaw in the process.

"Oww…" Puck said mildly as he rubbed at his jaw. "How am I going to live down the bruises, woman? They're already calling me whipped, but battered fake-boyfriend syndrome is going too far."

Rachel glared at him in her locker mirror as she smoothed her hair into place. "Ha ha, Noah. Just help me clean up this mess so I'm not late for class, ok?"

"I don't know if I can handle that sort of menial labor in my current medical condition, Berry." He tried his best to look pathetic as he knelt down to pick up her papers and folders, and saw that she was fighting a grin at his pity-party antics.

"Hmm, let me see." She took his chin gently in her hands and squinted at the so-called "bruising". "There's definitely discoloration. Probably intensive scarring too."

"I'm going to hold you responsible if people start calling me the Elephant man." He said with a smirk.

"I can't have people calling me an abusive fake-girlfriend, now can I?" She looked thoughtful for a moment. "How about I just kiss it and make it feel better?"

Puck's eyes widened in surprise as she leaned forward and placed soft kisses up and down his jaw line, ending with a slow, lingering kiss at his lips. Rachel Berry was kissing him in the middle of the hallway in front of the entire school…and making his jeans all sorts of uncomfortable on a Monday morning.

Rachel stood up and pulled out her Trig book, smoothing her skirt once more before closing her locker. Puck noticed that she had on lacy black knee-socks that almost counted as thigh-highs because of her stature. He also noticed that he could see straight up her mini-skirt from where he sat on the ground, and shook his head to get a grip.

"Oh, and Puck?" Rachel turned back as he scrambled to stand up.

"Yeah?"

She stood on tiptoe and leaned over to whisper in his ear. "He was probably screwing them both. The Professor strikes me as a man who would love a good three-way."

* * *

For the first time in his life Puck couldn't wait to go to class. Spanish class, that is. The one and only class that he had with Rachel each day.

Puck walked into Spanish class a record 10 minutes early, and was immediately attacked by a very angry Quinn.

"What in the hell have I ever done to you, and why are you out to ruin my life?!"

Puck stared dumb-founded at still-slender Cheerio. "What are you talking about? You asked me to back off, so I backed off!"

Quinn looked at him as though he had been dropped on his head when he was a baby. "It's not enough that you had to knock me up, but now you are dating that little girl?"

"Huh? What the fuck does that matter to you?" Puck was starting to get pissed. What had he been thinking, pining after the Ice Princess? "I offered to be there for you and the baby. You told me to get lost, and I did. What's the matter, haven't been able to convince lover-boy that he's the father?"

"How dare you!" Quinn poked him in the chest with every word. "Finn isn't some Lima loser with no future like you. He doesn't need to be confused by that little tramp you're dating."

Puck demeanor immediately changed and his voice lowered dangerously. "I've put up with your crap because you're carrying my baby, and I'm partly responsible. But don't you ever call Rachel a tramp."

"Partly responsible!" Quinn sneered.

"Yes, partly responsible! I used a condom. I'm not some moron who doesn't know how babies are made." Puck made his voice effeminate. "The doctor said the hot water makes the sperm swim faster!" He snorted in disgust. "Finn may be that stupid, but I'm not. We both had sex, and we both made that baby."

Quinn had turned bright red and looked like she wanted to slap him but he continued. "Rachel hasn't done anything wrong, and she doesn't deserve your pregnancy hormones bitch-fit."

"It's obvious she's just using you to make him jealous." Quinn spat at him.

It felt like a slap across the face.

"Maybe you should just worry about your own love life and leave mine the hell alone, Q." And with that he stalked over to his desk before she had a chance to continue.


End file.
